God decided in advance to adopt us into his own family by bringing us to himself through Jesus Christ. This is what he wanted to do, and it gave him great pleasure. (Ephesians 1:5 NLT)
We appreciate so many of you wanting to check in with us and see how everything is going. Although we have wanted to write this blog for a while now, we simply have not found the time to sit down and even start processing the last 12 days. As we start to now, it feels really good just to sit and reflect. So much has happened, it will be hard to do it justice, but we will try.
Let's begin with the 13 hour flight home on Saturday, April 19th. THANK YOU FOR PRAYING! The flight went way better than we expected. Other adoptive parents suggested we pay for a seat for him, and we are so glad we took that advice. We had three seats to ourselves, which gave Jedidiah some space to move around in. He was awake and taking it all in for the first 2 hours, and then fell fast asleep for 7 hours!! We could not believe it! He laid in between us and barely moved around. I must admit, it was heavenly! He woke up, ate, walked around with Brad, played with his toys for 3 hours and then slept again the last hour of the flight. Amazing!
And in O'Hare Airport, God totally had His hand on us. We landed at 4pm (25 minutes early!) and had to get across the airport to get our Madison flight, which was boarding at 5:35pm. What customs officials told us when we got off our Beijing flight was going to take 2 1/2 hours to get through, took us 1 hour! It was crazy! At each stop, customs workers put our papers to the front of the line (we didn't ask them to, they just kept doing it). We breezed through customs, and made our Madison flight with enough time for me to change Jedidiah's diaper and for Brad to purchase a Diet Mountain Dew! Yay on both accounts! :)
The newest US Citizen!
We were greeted at the Madison airport by nearly 25 friends and family members. It was a wonderful 'Welcome Home' for Jedidiah! It was so great to see everyone, and be home, despite being exhausted by the time change and travel. We could not get to our four other kids fast enough to hug and kiss them! And it was so fun for them to have this 'party' at the airport! We were so thankful for the outpouring of support!
Life at Home
It is a busy place over here! We had forgotten what it was like to have a 2 year old in the house, not to mention one who had his days and nights mixed up! The jet lag was pretty tough the first week. When Jedidiah wanted to be up, like between midnight and 3am, all Brad and I wanted to do was sleep. But, the last two nights Jedidiah has slept through the night, so yay! We are thinking the jet lag is mostly behind us!
It was so wonderful to be home for Easter! We spent the day together, just the 7 of us. The kids were completely enthralled with Jedidiah, as he was with them! The love continues, and it is just so fun to see them all together!
These shirts say big sister, big brother, and little brother.
What is going well:
His Siblings - We are in 'hibernation mode,' which means we are trying to spend most of our time just the 7 of us. It is a great way to build the bonding and lessen his insecurities. Ella, Jonah, Elijah, and Lila have been SO GREAT with him! They love playing with him and dote over him constantly. I am sure, at some point soon, this will wear off, but we are enjoying it right now!
Bonding - It is amazing to see him bonding with all of us. He has already started to bond in different ways to each of us, which shows how real and authentic it is. We have also seen him shedding more real tears - not just inconsolable meltdowns - but tears when he is tired or hurt or mad about a particular thing, which is so good. Those tears show he is starting to feel more comfortable with us and letting us know how he is feeling. He is definitely a 'mama's boy', which I love. We continue to keep clear roles to enable bonding. Brad and I are the parents, so we are the primary caretakers and meet all of his 'needs' - feeding him, changing his diapers, bathing him, dressing him, and putting him to sleep. The kids play with him and read to him (Brad and I do these things, too, but the kids just stick to these roles). It is working wonderfully. It is hard at times for the kids to not do the other things, but they know it is best, and soon enough they will get to engage with him in all areas. We do tell them there will come a day when they won't want to change another diaper or watch him when we go out...they don't believe us!
Another thing that is going well is Jedidiah is being much more affectionate with hugs and kisses. He will give me 'squeeze tights' all the time and gives the kids kisses non-stop sometimes. They love it!
Going up high - something only Brad can do with him!
Sleeping - Nighttime has finally turned a corner. Hopefully, he will continue this trend of sleeping through the night!
The Dog - He loves our dog, Tabbie! He follows her around all the time. She seeks shelter in her crate from time to time, but she is so good with him!
Medical Reports - He has been to see our pediatrician and also to UW Children's Hospital's Cleft and Craniofacial Anomalies Clinic. Our pediatrician, Dr. Yu, thought he was doing great. He did not think he was developmentally behind for his age. That is a huge praise because many orphans suffer delays just because of the lack of care. New Hope Foster Home does an amazing job caring for their children! At UW Hospital he saw 6 doctors and went through a bunch of testing. We just found out today that he passed with flying colors - we were most concerned about his hearing, but all the tests came back normal (at least in one ear...they can only be sure of normal hearing in one at this age). We will go back in October to check his speech - which can be impaired because of his palette. And he will need at least 3 more surgeries to repair things related to his cleft lip and palette, but the first one will not be until he is 4 or 5 years old. We are glad we have some time before a surgery.
Things that are challenging:
His strong will - Couple that with being a nearly 2 year old, and he can be beyond determined at times. He does a ton of testing the limits, and we do a ton of redirecting!
Getting a routine down - It is hard for me, because I like routine, but it is just not possible yet to be on a schedule. His napping during the day is not going well, but we will get there. We are trying to figure out how to fit all of our school in during the day. Some days go better than others, but it is going to take a while. And I am finding it easier to be good with that. Acclimating Jedidiah to this new life is much more important right now than any consistent routine!
Balance - It is definitely a challenge balancing everyone's needs and figuring out how to do life in the midst of the kids' activities.
But each day we experience break throughs...we talk more, check in more with each other, have longer stints of sleep, have meltdowns that don't last as long or where Jedidiah asks for consoling sooner and sooner. It is so awesome to see so much progress already!
It is hard to describe all that has happened in the Gunnink house these last 12 days since returning from China. I can say for sure that our hearts have been touched and opened in a way we have not felt before. To have the adoption process completed, to be home, with Jedidiah as the newest member of our family is the BEST feeling in the world! To be at this place all together is still almost surreal at times.
I love being honest about what the last 12 days have been, because I can honestly say, I wouldn't trade any of these moments. I already see God growing us and teaching us. It can be humbling, but so good for each of us. I pray every day that God will help me be the mom that Jedidiah needs me to be for him right now, that Brad will be the dad he needs, that God will give us insights into the hearts of each of our other four kids in a way only He can so we don't miss anything they need right now in this transition. We are very inward focused...on becoming a healthy family of seven. No other priorities right now. It feels good.
Thanks for being on this journey with us!
Jedidiah loves to help the other kids with their chores. It is very cute!
